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Great Rebounds in Cinematic History

1.) I watched “That Thing You Do” last weekend and even though it basically devoles into a skin-a-max movie in the last 5 minutes–Guy and Faye walk back into the hotel after making out on the street, and Guy says to Lemar, the magical hotel bell boy who loves his job (or does he own the hotel? He does call it “My hotel” but what hotel owner would also work as a bell boy?) “Watch my bags Lemar…”  Lemar smiles creepily into the camera and says, “That’s what I do!”–End of movie. So that’s what Lemar does? Watch people’s…

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The Kick That Wasn’t Heard Around the World and Week 9 Picks

Couple things I want to point out this week. Cam Newton led the Panthers down the field Sunday afternoon through a 2-minute drive for over 70 yards that included a 4th & 15. With 30 seconds left to go on the clock, the kicking team comes out onto the field, and Orlando Mare whiffed a 31-yard chip shot and the Panthers lose the game. No one is talking about this because let’s face it, who wants to talk about about an almost game-winning 2 minute drive? Well, I do. Briefly. I think it’s fair to say that Cam Newton…

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Tebow Anxiety

Damn you, Tim Tebow!  Damn you straight to hell!  It’s Sunday morning, 9:25 a.m. and I can either start Tebow against the Lions D (who I own) or I can start Matt Schaub against the Jags. I’ve wanted to go with Schaub all week, but now, here I sit, seriously considering putting in Tebow.  Why? Cause the man put up like 25 pts in 2 minutes last week!  Sure he sucked for the whole game, but he has the potential to be fantasy gold int he 4th quarter. So you sit and bitch for 3 quarters about how terrible…

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Making Love to Ozzie Guillen and Theo Epstein

Alright, maybe the World Series is pretty cool now. It would be really cool if the series goes to 7, but I think Texas is taking it home. I don’t really have much game analysis for ya, but I DO have commentator analysis. ESPN, what were you thinking giving Ozzie Guillen the microphone for Baseball Tonight? Are you kidding me?? Ozzie’s analysis went something like this, “Das right, heehadde gud peetch to eet an dasts whut jugottado when hegget a gudd peetch to-eet. All dem players deyspend so much tiyeeme wourking onder macanics, spenning alldis tiyeme ahbatting prasstis, daswhat…

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Sunday Morning…The Calm Before the Storm

Alrighty, I’ve been slacking with the posts lately, so I thought I would do one on this glorious Sunday morning cause there’s been a few things on my mind. Let’s get right to it, shall we? 1.) Note to NBA players and owners: Nobody even remotely cares that you’re not playing basketball. Look, I love watching and talking about the Sixers, but I can live without them.  You know why?  Cause there is still college basketball to be played where the action is faster, there are more exciting turnovers and the players actually give a shit. NBA, you could…

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Week 7 NFL Picks & Fantasy Miracle Predictions

Don’t ask about the picture. I typed in fantasy miracle and Google brought me back about 100 pictures of boobies. I’m not going to say no. It was now my duty to find the best boobies I could. Well, the World Series is living up to all of our expectations. It’s boring and nobody cares except St. Louis and Texas. A lot of good pitching (yawn) and little offense has me switching the channels faster than anyone’s business. 3 things are saving me this fall. Football is one. The other two are Workaholics and Parks and Rec. The fact…

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In West Philadelphia, Born and Raised…..

Will Smith and his wife Jada Pinkett-Smith are now partial owners of the Philadelphia 76ers. That. Is. Awesome. A midst all the terrible basketball news, a small shining face peers through the clouds and allows a bit of sunshine in. That face is Will Smith’s. Welcome to the 76ers, Mr. Smith. Last year, Adam, Brendan (former, much lazier writer), and I attended a Sixers/OKC game and sat courtside. We were within feet of Andre Iguodala, Coach Collins, and many others. This year, if David Stern permits, we’ll be sitting court-side once more, but this time along with Will Smith….

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