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I’m Older Than Every Baseball Player, Except Jamie Moyer

Sixers. Ugggggghhh. Phillies. Blehhhhhh. Flyers. OHHHH YEEAAAAAAHHH!!! The Flyers have single-handedly revived my interest in hockey and my hate in the Penguins. The last 3 games have been epic. All high scoring. Lotta hits. Keep em coming. It’s pretty nuts how the Flyers basically put the magnifying glass on Sidney Crosby and probably ruined his reputation for the rest of his career. Asham got suspended for 4 games and Neal got suspended for 1. I’d say your Stanley Cup aspirations are over, Pittsburgh. The Phillies aren’t really winning me over, that’s for sure. I know Ty Wigginton had a…

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This Guy Walks Through the Raindrops

1.) Ok then. If you haven’t watched the clip of Chris Klein from the movie: “The Legend of Chun Li” you need to go do so right now and then come back. It is, without a doubt, the BEST acting clip I’ve seen since those ladies in the Wicker Man poured bee’s into Nic Cage’s eyes, or since Nic Cage punched one of those ladies in a bear suit (for reference, check out the Wicker Man clips posted on Youtube). My favorite lines are: “You don’t want a ticket to this dance detective.” “Yeah last supper. And he serves them,…

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The King of the Losers

And the winner of this year’s NCAA March Madness Bracket is….. DRUMROLL….. MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!! That’s right, folks. Ya boy took it down. The name of my bracket? A very simple, ‘Randy – The NBA is better.’ I wish I could describe some of my strategy, but to be quite honest, there wasn’t any. I spend the first round picking the higher seeds, then, I just started randomly promoting teams to the next round with no rhyme or reason. Before the tournament, the big buzz was that Kentucky was favored to be the champion, so that’s who I picked. And people…

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Grab Yourself a Can of Pork Soda

Can anybody name the band that can claim the above lyric/album title? I just had some delicious pork for lunch (that’s about the 5th time in a two-week span that I’ve gorged myself with pork) and I gotta say, it was good stuff. I wasn’t really going to write anything until tomorrow, but whatever, I figure I’ll get some of it out of the way now while I have this Red-Bull pork in me. 1.) The Raiders hosted free agent linebacker Philip Wheeler from the Colts yesterday and I really want them to sign this guy.  Why?  Not cause…

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Parents Just Don’t Understand

Dang, Jodie Meeks!! To be honest, I totally didn’t think you had it in you to score 31 points in a game. You probably never will again, either, but it was still pretty cool. You know what would’ve been even cooler? Doing that against a team with a real defense. Lately, all I’ve been hearing from the Sixers is “We want to win the Atlantic Division, that is our goal.” Well, that’s great, except setting a goal that stops right before the playoffs doesn’t necessarily get you a prize at the end of the day. I know a lot…

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I Would Walk 900 Miles

1.) Somebody needs to put an end to that Taco Bell commercial where the teenager kidnaps 4 of his friends and drives 900 miles to a Taco Bell. 900 Miles! That is the most ridiculous thing that I have ever seen. I don’t know anybody who would drive 9 miles to a Taco Bell. As NT put it when I ran this joke past him, “Why didn’t they just drive to Mexico and get some real tacos?” Indeed. Plus, as NT also pointed out, how many Taco Bell’s did they pass in that 900 mile stretch?  I can see…

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Peyton Manning Ends up a Bronco, Del Donne a Phenom

After all the woo, all the hype, Peyton Manning has decided to end up in Denver for, most likely, the rest of his career. I guess John Elway did it for him, because I have to think that the receivers didn’t. Who on Earth is Peyton Manning going to throw to? Eric Decker?? Note to self : Draft Eric Decker in first round, win entire Fantasy Championship. I’m not sure why he chose Denver of all places, but the real question is: What is going to happen to poor Tebow? Poooooooor Tebow! Let the scrutiny and speculation begin. I’ll…

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