I Would Walk 900 Miles

1.) Somebody needs to put an end to that Taco Bell commercial where the teenager kidnaps 4 of his friends and drives 900 miles to a Taco Bell. 900 Miles! That is the most ridiculous thing that I have ever seen. I don’t know anybody who would drive 9 miles to a Taco Bell.

As NT put it when I ran this joke past him, “Why didn’t they just drive to Mexico and get some real tacos?” Indeed.

Plus, as NT also pointed out, how many Taco Bell’s did they pass in that 900 mile stretch?  I can see them coming up to one of the blue highway signs that lists all the restaurants:

Grant: “Uh, Derrick, didn’t we just pass a Taco Bell?”


2.) I was watching “Into the Blue” on Saturday (don’t ask, I was sick all day and in a Benadryl induced coma), but something happened in that movie and it really gets on my nerves.

So they find this buried treasure under the sea, and all 4 characters are out to eat dinner (it is totally light out), and Paul Walker’s character starts in on a speech about the treasure saying, “The treasure belonged to this French Pirate” and Scott Caan’s character says, “Well, dude, who was this French pirate exactly?”  Which leads to Walker and Alba launching into a history lesson about the pirate and his ship.

But here’s the thing: Walker starts talking at dinner, then they cut to a scene where he is talking at a campfire.  It’s completely dark and they have moved locations, but he is finishing the exact same sentence that he started during dinner.

So what happened in the meantime? Did he just get distracted, stop his story for 3 hours and then pick it up again at a later time?  Or was he like, “So the pirates name is Dan and he…hold on, let me wait till we get to the campfire to continue this sentence.”  It happens in “Field of Dreams” too when Ray is talking to his daughter about Shoeless Joe Jackson. I would be very irritated if somebody was telling me a story, stopped completely, and then picked it up 3 hours later as if nothing had happened in the meantime.

3.) I saw the trailer for Ridley Scott’s “Prometheus” and it looks awesome, but something happened in the middle of the trailer that made me burst out laughing. It’s a science fiction movie and these two people are outside of the space ship investigating something, and then Stringer Bell from the Wire pops up and says “Whatever that probe’s picking up, it’s reading life form” only he says it in a RIDICULOUS Texas accent.  High comedy.  I don’t know what Idris Elba was thinking, but I haven’t heard a southern accent that bad since Nic Cage in Con Air.

“Put da bunny…back in da box.”

4.) Nothing is more embarrassing than having a Headrush Tournament pick em Yahoo League and losing to your wife…that’s why I’m trying to hide that fact in item 4. Cause you all skip over item 4, right? Stefanie is currently tied for first place with NT (Though she has more possible points remaining), Randy sitting in a respectable 3rd, and I’m in 5th. Still a lot of basketball to be played, though, but I’m pretty sure we all (Me, NT, Stef and Randy) have Kentucky winning it.

5.) The Saints deserved what they got. Why all the whining? I mean look, I’m sure other teams had bounty programs in place, BUT the NFL was investigating the Saints and the Saints lied to them about the whole program existing. Think about that.

If you were doing something at work, your boss told you to stop, you didn’t stop but lied to them and told them that you did, and then they found out you lied…You’d be screwed!  That’s why I have no sympathy for the Saints.

6.) Speaking of, that text message that Jeremy Shockey posted is the weirdest thing that I have ever seen take place between a coach and a player. I don’t even think I need to add anything so I will let the message speak for itself:

Is this real life?  There is no way that is really Sean Payton sending those texts. Why in the world would he have “hug!!!!!!” at the top of the conversation? Peculiar.

7.) One more thing: Drew Brees, I think you need to sit the next few rounds out. After the punishment came down, he got on twitter and said, “I am speechless. Sean Payton is a great man, coach, mentor and a phenomenal hugger (ed. note: I may have added this part). The best there is. I need to hear an explanation for this punishment.”

Um, Drew, I have nothing to do with the NFL and even I was able to hear an explanation for the punishment. Just go on ANY NFL RELATED WEBSITE THERE IS, and you will be able to find the reasons behind the punishments. I used to like Brees, but after this off season and all the contract stuff, he seems like a prick.

8.) I’m not too concerned with Peyton coming to the AFC West for a few reasons: a.) The Raiders are in rebuilding mode and I’m not expecting them to win the division next year.

b.) If you hit Peyton in exactly the right spot, it’s going to be like a scene straight outta Mutant League Football with Bones Jackson sending his head spinning into outer space. Seriously, the man has had four neck surgeries. He really shouldn’t be playing football.

c.) He looks old as dirt. The Broncos will probably get one good season out of him, but I doubt they’ll get two.

d.) Tebow is gone, which makes me happy.

That’s all I got.  Till next time….


  • The English teacher would respond that perhaps in the Benadryl induced coma, you didn’t realize that there was a flashback seen. Hmmm. No, it was the first time these guys have ever talked about this, it may have taken them hours to give the backstory about the pirates and the treasure, but they gotta wrap the movie in under two hours, or perhaps the story they were telling actually transported the hearer to some other time and place. As a good story should. Sounds as if Into the Blue just didn’t do it for you. When I start questioning some part of the movie, I know that they just didn’t do a good enough job. Perhaps the whole crew was smoking weed during the production and didn’t notice that BIG SNAFU. Thanks for sharing.

  • I would drive 9 miles to Taco Bell…

  • A six exclamation point hug, eh? What was said before that is what I want to know. Payton’s texts kind of look like how cousin Bryan felt at your wedding.

  • All of these awesome topics and you forgot to mention one thing….. The Alien LOL hahah how could you forget the little alien head coming out of the body haha too funny. Pure Comic. I’ll take cred for 1st place but there are still games left and it can still go anyway!
    Hopefully Im still numero uno. Guess we will just have to wait and see!
    Put the bunny back in da box lol great movie!

Join the Discussion