Tag Archive: von miller

Post Super Bowl Thoughts

February 6, 2012 Adam Thomas

1.)  This Super Bowl gave us an instantly classic moment and no I’m not talking about Eli Manning’s crazy pass to Mario Manningham (although that was pretty memorable). I’m talking about 5 minutes into the first quarter, when every wife/girlfriend in America turned to their husband/boyfriend and asked: ‘What’s a safety?’

2.) How come Eli Manning and Tom Coughlin get kissed into the Hall of Fame after their second Super Bowl win and yet Jim Plunkett and Tom Flores–QB and Coach for the Raiders–who both have two Super Bowl rings get no love?

Then Curtis Martin gets in?  Are you KIDDING ME?  Curtis Martin was like the 10th best running back in Madden 99 and yet he makes the Hall of Fame?  What the heck?

3.) Since ESPN has glossed over this point at every opportunity, let me just shed light on one little thing: Tom Brady and Bill Belichick have not won a super bowl post-spy gate. Let me repeat this: the Patriots have never won a super bowl without videotaping their opponents. This is why it was so important for them to win yesterday.  If they win yesterday, they have a legit championship.  But they lost, and so every time somebody mentions the Pats three super bowls, all of us haters can say, “Yes…but they cheated.”

4.) On Friday night after the Sixers game, a very inebriated older woman stood in traffic dancing around like an idiot while depressed Philly fans beeped their horns and yelled at her.  During her halftime show, Madonna looked like a mix between that drunk woman and a new-born baby just learning how to walk.

5.) I didn’t even notice that M.I.A. flipped the bird. But who cares?  Jeez folks, let’s all calm it down a bit.

6.) I read an article on Yahoo that was supposed to make me feel bad for Brady and see how much this loss meant to him. Note to the writer: if you want me to feel sympathy for the devil, please don’t put in a sentence like, “where his wife, Brazilian Supermodel….”

7.) No good ads this year, but there never are!  This is the biggest myth in America. The Super Bowl ads always try way too hard to be funny. The only Super Bowl ad that I ever found funny was the ad about ten years ago with the “Cat Herders” where the cowboys herded cats across a barren desert and sat around the campfire using lint rollers to get the hair off their leather outfits.  Yeah, and even that sounds stupid when I write it out.

8.) From now until eternity, there will not be a Super Bowl in the Thomas house hold that does not involve Chili.  Stef made a pot yesterday and it was INCREDIBLE! I am counting down the minutes until I can have some for lunch. Chili will be seeping out of my pours by Wednesday. Special thanks to Deadspin’s Drew Magary who included a chili recipe in his excellent Super Bowl Jamboroo, which gave us the inspiration to make some chili!

9.) Now that the football is out of the way, it’s time to focus on the best sporting event of the year: THE NFL DRAFT!  And just because Kiper and McShay never live up to their mistakes, it’s time for me to own up to mine.  Here’s what I wrote last year about Von Miller:

“I think that Von Miller guy is going to be the biggest bust in the draft.  He looks tiny as hell and he just seems like the kind of guy who gets all sorts of buzz and then never does anything.  Tyson Jackson anyone?”

hahahahaha, what an IDIOT!  Von Miller just won Defensive Rookie of the Year.  So…yeah…I was juuuust a bit off on that one.

10.) Super Bowl picks for next year?  Hows about the Texans and the 49ers!  Yeah buddy!

Alright, that’s all for me.  But I’m hoping to be back this week with another post.


Random Thoughts: Post First Round Edition

April 29, 2011 Adam Thomas

This draft seemed like it was one of the crappiest in recent memory.  Who are these guys?  They all look like they are 13 years old and none of them look particularly dominant in the high light videos that they showed.

Case in point: The ATL Falcons traded next years first and a bunch of other picks to trade up and grab Julio Jones.  After they did, the first video ESPN showed was Julio Jones dropping a ton of easy passes.  Then this morning, a Yahoo columnist declares the Falcons winners for taking him.  Wait…what?

The Falcons did a stupid thing.  Can you imagine if the Raiders made that trade?  Good God all mighty, everyone would be ripping them to shreds!  So to the Falcons, I bestow them with my dumbest move of the draft (DMOD) award.


2.) SECOND DUMBEST MOVE OF THE DRAFT: Panthers.  We’ve seen this movie before.  We know how it’s gonna end.  Did you see Cam Newton’s dad?  He looked like and spoke like a crooked Jesse Jackson. “I don’t…care if he’s…Mr. Irrelevant.  GOD IS GOOD!  GOD IS GOOD!”  What Cam’s dad was obviously trying to say was “CHA-CHING!  CHA-CHING!”  Sad day for the Panthers, they just won’t realize it until 2013.  Cam Newton acts like an entitled prick and he is gonna hold out for millions and then suck up the joint when he gets his chance to start.

3.) THIRD DUMBEST MOVE OF THE DRAFT: Broncos.  Yesterday I wrote that Von Miller was going to be the bust of the draft, so I was delighted to hear the pre-draft rumors that the Broncos were gonna draft him.  Then, when they did draft him and he started to cry, my dad looked at me and said, “He’s soft.”  So thank you, Broncos!  You made my day last year by drafting Tebow and you made it again this year by grabbing Miller!

(Note: If the Broncos trounce the Raiders on Monday Night Football with Tebow going off for 300 yds passing, 150 yads rushing and 4 tds and Miller gets 3 sacks, feel free to come on here and rip me a new one, cause really, I’m just trying to stir the pot.  That’s what all us bloggers do, ya know?)

4.) FOURTH DUMBEST MOVE OF THE DRAFT: The Bears.  So, let me get this straight, they wanted to trade with the Ravens but didn’t confirm it with the league, which made the Ravens lose their spot to the Chiefs.  Who in the world is running the Bears?  If that happened in a fantasy football draft, holy balls people would be at each others throats!  I can only imagine what was being said in the Ravens war room.  But at least they got that CB who is addicted to codein syrup.  Nothing bad has ever come from a little syzzzurp, right?


Best Moves of the draft:

1.) Lions grabbing Fairley, the DT from Auburn.  I’ve always wondered why more teams don’t just build on their strengths.  The Lions have a great DT already, why not make him even better by pairing him with the guy who was projected to go number one just a month ago?

2.) Chiefs.  Good Lord, that was a nice pick getting that WR from Pitt.  The Chiefs are winning the AFC West again next year.

3.) Saints getting Mark Ingram.  Fourth round fantasy pick anybody?

4.) Cardinals getting Patrick Peterson.  He was the best player in the draft.  Why don’t teams at number one go with the best player?  The QB thing works out once out of every 30000 picks.  It makes no sense to me.  For every Peyton Manning there are 30 JaMarcus’s.

Ah well, that’s the way the cookie crumbles.  Rounds two and three are tonight.  Enjoy!


Random Thoughts: Pre-Draft Edition

April 28, 2011 Adam Thomas

1.) The Sixers put up a good fight, but the Heat just had too much talent. You know, for a team that shot 57 more free throws in the series, the Heat sure do whine and complain a lot.  Also, I meant to comment on this last week but forgot.  I watched an interview with Wade where he talked about his mother being a drug dealer and at one point he said something like, “When I was three, cops burst into my house and one put his gun to the back of my head and said, ‘Where’s your mother?'”

I’m calling bullshit on that one.  Cops have been known to do some shady stuff, but putting a gun to a 3 year old’s head?  I don’t think so.

Boston seems like they should be able to beat them.  The Heat won’t be able to get rebounds like they did against the Sixers and the foul calls should even out (since the Celtics have stars that the Refs care about protecting as well).

In the end, the Heat were better than the Sixers.  But using the breakfast analogy and tacking on a dunk at the end of the game, that’s why everyone hates these guys.  Not because they are envious of their talent, but because they needlessly act like assholes.

2.) The NFL owners need to stop crying and get back to football.  Look, at the beginning of this whole thing, I was with the owners if only because the players union rep seemed completely inept.  But now, it’s over.  Just move on, we got a draft to focus on!

3.) Speaking of, I think that Von Miller guy is going to be the biggest bust in the draft.  He looks tiny as hell and he just seems like the kind of guy who gets all sorts of buzz and then never does anything.  Tyson Jackson anyone?

4.) Did you know that the most successful pirate of all time was a…wait for it…WOMAN!  Oh.  My.  Gaw.  It’s true!  She was called the Dragon Lady and would do all sorts of nutty stuff like have her crew drink wine laced with gun powder and pay her pirates for each head they brought her, so guys would fight with decapitated heads tied together by their hair and draped over their shoulders.  Also, she married her adopted son (ick) and eventually gained amnesty from the Chinese government, who gave her a crap ton of land and money to stop being a pirate.  At her most powerful, she commanded something like 70,000 pirates spread out across 9 different fleets.  Do work, Dragon Lady!

5.) I’m getting back into all the music I loved in high school: Phish, Grateful Dead, Mothers Magillicutty and it has made me wonder, why in the heck did I ever stop listening to this stuff in the first place?

I’ll be back with post-draft thoughts tomorrow.