Tag Archive: fantasy football

First Fantasy Football Draft of the Season: A Review

August 30, 2012 Adam Thomas

My first fantasy football draft of the season came and went last night, and a lot of knowledge was gleaned from the event. Most importantly is this: Don’t schedule a draft for 6:45 East Coast time when you have players participating on the west coast. Out of 12 teams, only 5 showed up, and one of those was in about round 12 when he had already drafted most of his team.

With that said, I am going to do a round by round review (up until round 10 when it’s more or less a crapshoot), showing you both my pick and the pick that I think was the best pick.  Without further ado, let’s get to it:

Round One

My Pick: Matthew Stafford (12th overall)

Best Pick: Aaron Rodgers (4th overall)

First of all, how in the world does the commish of a league end up with the 12th pick?  That should be illegal. My strategy going in was if I had a high pick, go with Rodgers, Brees or McCoy or Rice and if I had a low pick, just to go with the best QB available.  So when it came my time to pick, I had to go with Stafford or Cam Newton.  It was a tough call, but in the end, I went with Stafford.

Beenusbangsyou drafted Rodgers at 4th overall, which is fantastic since I think that he is the number one pick this year.

Round Two

My Pick: Jimmy Graham (1st pick of the round)

Best Pick: Jimmy Graham

Such hubris.  But I gotta say, looking at the players who were drafted after Graham, I’m glad I made the pick. I definitely would not want Larry Fitzgerald, Jordy Nelson, Marshawn Lynch, Jamaal Charles, MJD, Victor Cruz or DeMarco Murray instead. The only picks that I liked that round were A.J. Green, Julio Jones and Cam Newton.

Since I already had a QB, I went with the best TE available. By the way, how sad is it that it’s round 2 and people are already drafting the likes of DeMarco Murray.  Yeeesh.

Round Three

My Pick: Steve Smith (12th pick of the round)

Best Pick: Steven Jackson (11th pick of the round)

Since I wanted to draft Jackson, I have to list him.  You have no idea how pissed I was when he was AUTO DRAFTED right from under my nose. Not cool.  Luckily, Stefanie made me a nice bean and rice burrito and some cornbread around this time, so my anger quickly passed.

Round Four

My Pick: Greg Jennings (1st pick of the round)

Best Pick: Michael Turner (7th pick of the round)

I really like Michael Turner in the 4th round.  By the way, Wolfman picked him up and that gave him McFadden, Peterson and Turner. If that ain’t a fancy stable of running backs, I don’t know what is.

I picked Jennings after Smith just because I’ve had him for the past 2 years in a row so it’s kind of tradition that I get him on my team.

Round Five

My Pick: Tony Romo (12th overall)

Best Pick: Brandon Lloyd (5th overall)

I picked up Romo here as trade bait, so hopefully I will be able to unload him before the season starts. If not, Stafford is kind of injury prone so it doesn’t hurt to have him as insurance.

Brandon Lloyd is going to have a great year, so that was a great pickup by my buddy Bob.

Round Six

My Pick: Vernon Davis (1st pick of the round)

Best Pick: Peyton Manning (7th pick of the round)

I was strongly considering grabbing Manning and just hoarding all of the QBs to later trade to all those who auto picked, but then I thought that I could do the same with TE’s. Also, the league has a flex position so if I can’t trade Davis, it never hurts to have him on the roster.

I like Peyton here because he could put up monster numbers and if he doesn’t, the next picks were Jermichael Finley, BenHarvus Green-Ellis, Vincent Jackson, Michael Bush and Fred Davis so it’s not like your missing out on anything special by drafting him.

Round Seven

My Pick: Rashad Jennings (12th pick of the round)

Best Pick: Phillip Rivers (2nd pick of the round)

I like Jennings because of MJD’s holdout. It means that he is going to be the man for at least the first two weeks and he catches a good amount of passes. The Rivers pick is the best of the round because he could actually turn out to be better than the QB Randy took in the 3rd round (Eli Manning). It also lets him relive the 2004 NFL Draft each week of the season.

Round Eight

My Pick: Reggie Wayne (1st pick of the round)

Best Pick: Jason Witten (7th pick of the round)

Reggie Wayne is a like a house on Property Brothers. It looks crappy now, but just wait until those magicians and Andrew Luck get their hands on it and turn it into real estate (and fantasy) GOLD!

Wolfman again! Witten could be the 3rd best TE this year, so to get him in the 8th round is good stuff. Maybe some dumbass who took Vernon Davis 2 rounds earlier should’ve considered this, eh?

Round Nine

My Pick: Cedric Benson (12th pick of the round)

Best Pick: Kenny Britt (2nd pick of the round)

Britt will be suspended for at least a game, but once you get past that week, he is going to light it up. Mark my words: Titans all the way.

I had to get a running back here, and now my back field looks BEAUTIFUL!  Just kidding, I have Rashad Jennings and Cedric Benson for crying out loud!

Round Ten

My Pick: Toby Gerhart (1st pick of the round)

Best Pick: Toby Gerhart

Considering everyone else took kickers and defense, I have to give this one to myself.

Looking back, I took 5 RBs in the next 6 rounds.  I am just hoping that one of them hits. My team definitely needs to improve but hey, I like my QB, WR and TEs so of course the RB position is going to be weak. Sometimes, you just gotta compromise.

That’s it for me.  Good luck with your drafts!


My Fantasy Team is ‘The Evelyn Lozada Headbutts’

August 14, 2012 Randy Neil

Sometimes I wonder how successful the NFL would be without fantasy football. I don’t ever recall being that enthralled with the spectacle until 2004 when I first started playing the game. There was finally a reason to cheer for players that I would never care about otherwise. There’s something unique about it, in that fantasy baseball feels like a job and is NEVER satisfying, even when you’re winning. Fantasy basketball I have yet to try, but I imagine that it’s on the same level of fantasy golf. Slow, unrewarding, and probably a bit too nerdy for public perception.

Fantasy football, however, is a MAN’s sport. At this point, I think it would be fair to say that ~90% of people in the United States play fantasy football. That seems like a huge exaggeration in some regards, but if we included ‘Pick’Em Leagues’ and simple work leagues and bets, that figure might be an understatement. Everybody does it.

You know who’s really good at it? Pretty much nobody, including yours truly. You can certainly put the research in before the draft, but it’s almost still kind of a crap-shoot. Darren McFadden was a great pick until he sat on your bench the last 8 weeks of the season, right?

But that’s why we play the game, friends. Some notables about this upcoming season:

1) I was really looking forward to the revival tour of Chad Johnson, Terrell Owens, and Randy Moss. I was almost going to publicly make a bet with Adam to wager on who would have the best season. Now that Chad Johnson’s out of the running, the stakes seem a little diminished. Never the less, there are still going to be two super-seasoned veterans (who I believe are both tied for second place in all time touchdowns) trying to revive their careers in the public spotlight. The traditional fellah would tell you to take Randy Moss. He’s playing on a Super Bowl contending team, Alex Smith is throwing to him, and Jim Harbaugh likes to air the ball out.

On the flipside, Matt Flynn will be throwing to Terrell Owens in Seattle. Flynn had an awesome season last year (basically, 1 game), but he definitely raised some eyebrows. Moss has competition in Mario Manningham, Michael Crabtree, and Ted Ginn Jr., where as Owens has absolutely none. I think he’s going to get the ball a lot more. If I had to place my money today…. I think I’m taking Owens.

Also, side note, but Chad Johnson has absolutely destroyed his life and I kind of feel bad for the guy. The Dolphins cut him immediately, his TV show got cancelled, and now he’s probably going to get a divorce from one of the hottest women on the planet. He wasn’t even performing that well on the field. You can say he was arrogant and maybe boasted too much, so now look at him, etc, but every other star receiver who’s doing really well pretty much acts the exact same way. You almost have to build up the ego to survive that much pressure. You don’t, however, need to BloodSport Van Damme a bitch in her head.

2) Call me crazy, but I’m going to draft a QB first…. again. I don’t really understand the logic behind drafting a running back first. Even in systems where QB touchdowns are 4 points and they get 1 point for every 25 yards, you’re still not going to find a more consistent option. At the end of the year, the top 10 quarterbacks always surpass the top 10 running backs in total points accrued. Unless the league nerfs quarterbacks ridiculously, it seems like a no-brainer to me.

3) I tried to implement a two-quarterback system in my league this year and was met with violent protest. It was eerily similar to people rallying against health care reform. I would make a point, backed up with statistics and information to solidify that point, and then people would just angrily shoot it down with belittling comments. If I recall, the biggest argument against a two-quarterback system was “it was stupid.” Well played.

Hear me out, folks. There are two positions in the traditional fantasy league roster that contain overly dominant players in comparison to the field. Quarterbacks and tight-ends. If you had Vernon Davis the past 3 years, you would know that no one is coming close to you in that category. It was almost absurd. For quarterbacks, Drew Brees pretty much ran the table during 2011-12. Sure, other quarterbacks did stellar, but in total yardage and touchdowns, he was a landslide (he totaled nearly 1000 yards more than the next closest QB.)

The two-quarterback system would definitely balance out that dominance. Two above-average quarterbacks would beat out Drew Brees and Colt Mccoy any day (they do, I’ve done the math.) Plus, it would be more fun. You’re back up quarterback would actually become a part of the game rather than waiting to fill your one bye week where he amounts to nothing. More points = more fun.

Alas, it won’t happen this year, but like many great pioneers, it will take some time to make the masses understand.

4) Some of these guys are going to suck, under-perform, or simply get injured. Some of these guys are going to be awesome. I have segregated them for you:

Guys who will suck

Adrian Peterson
Michael Vick
Mike Wallace
Darren Sproles

Guys who will be awesome

LeSean McCoy
Michael Bush
Chris Johnson
A.J. Green
Dez Bryant

Prove me wrong Fantasy Gods!!


The Jinx

June 18, 2012 Adam Thomas

Article By the Wolfman

All too often in following sports we attribute outcomes (at least in my family and circle of friends) to things that we do during the course of a game. When things are going wrong we switch jerseys, change seats, flip channels, or turn our hats backwards. Of course, we are usually hundreds of miles away from where these events take place, often thousands, so it is very unlikely that we have any real impact on the outcome whatsoever. Yet, for some reason every time Randy writes something positive about the Sixers we all cringe. And more often than not, they lose. And we, more often than not, blame Randy.

During a Raiders game long ago, my family became extremely annoyed with Cris Collinsworth’s badmouthing of the Raiders. Suddenly in a fit of royal genius, I remembered I had an old Collinsworth card somewhere in my old collection of football cards, stuffed in old Utz pretzel barrels, in my folk’s basement. Without hesitation I retrieved his card, and my father, brother (Adam of this blog), and I ceremoniously sent the card into our fireplace.

The Raiders record since that occurrence: 6-125. The Collinsworth jinx is severely strong.

Just kidding. My last entry was stat heavy; in this one the stats will be largely fictionalized.

This year, just before the Bulls vs. Sixers playoff series, a friend of mine who is a Bulls fan, sent a text to me saying, “Even if Rose (Derrick) tears his ACL, we’ll still crush you.” I replied of course, “You better hope that doesn’t happen now.” Forty-seven basketball minutes later, with a decent sized lead, we know what happened to poor Mr. Rose.

So did my friend’s historically horrific karmic text set into motion events that wounded one of the best NBA players in the league? Or was that just the way it was meant to be?

Probably the latter. After all, Rose had been hurt off and on all season. He jumped and landed awkwardly, and that was that. Still, I’m sure my friend regrets that text, much more so than I regret eating half a Red Baron pizza last night – and that is quite a bit of regret.

Of course, every sports fan knows that the only way to combat a jinx is with a reverse jinx. One way, is to overtly get overly complimentary and admit defeat before a game even begins – while in the back of your mind knowing and counting on the opposite outcome.  Here is the best example I have seen to date (and it was against me in a fantasy football championship):

No jinxing involved. His team put up 276 more points than mine (the second best team) during the regular season. He is clearly going to win this weekend and Vercengetorix is going to go down as one of the most dominant teams in the history of our league. This match seems to merely be a formality.

(Three full paragraphs omitted. No joke.)

Despite the fact that we aren’t going to win a championship, my team has had a good run this year. We persevered through some injuries and disappointments (I’m looking at you McFadden and Freeman), and I think we proved we can compete for championships when we pay attention week in, week out (a problem for me in recent seasons). We look forward to building on this momentum next year.

Obviously, I couldn’t compete against a reverse jinx that strong – this reverse jinx even referenced itself in the opening statement. It had statistical analysis, shaky knees, and even a concession of defeat. I tried to counter this strong reverse jinx with an all out freeze out. No messages. And I lost. The reverse jinx was too strong. My other mistake was naming my team after a Gaul chieftain, Vercengetorix, who eventually was defeated by Caesar.

So, where does that leave us?

For review, here is how the two forms of jinxing work again. In both cases you first have to assume that universe is going to do everything in its power to prove you wrong. With a jinx you merely state something, usually positive, about a team or outcome. For example, the Patriots are so good this year, there is no way they can possible lose the Superbowl. Outcome, the Patriots lose the Superbowl.

With a reverse jinx, you invite the universe to prove you wrong, to better a team or outcome. For example, the Phillies have had a tough year, despite there being no chance at a Championship this year, we had a good run over the past few years and look forward to getting everyone back healthy. Outcome, TBD.

So do I believe in this hocus pocus? Not really. I mean, how many people out there have experienced something similar? Probably everyone. But that is the point. If we are all jinxing and reverse-jinxing each other, which one ultimately wins out?


Just in case.

To everyone I will ever compete against in fake sports. Your teams are just too strong. We had a good run, but it is just not our time, from now until infinity. We strongly thank you for inviting us to compete in this league, and we will give it our best shot next season, from now until infinity.

And if anyone out there has a Cris Collisnworth card, we are active buyers.


We’ve Got the Coolest Fantasy (and Weddings) Around

September 6, 2011 Randy Neil

First, I gotta talk about this guy. Way to be, fellah. If you didn’t see it, my man in the Phillies jersey over here decided to lean over the railing to catch what was going to be Hunter Pence’s double. Marlin’s outfielder Bryan Petersen complained that it interfered with his catch (which it did) and the umpires got together to review the play.

All the while, our friend in the stands sits on his cell phone, radiating with glee because of the amazing event that just happened to him! He couldn’t have had a bigger smile. Does he not remember Steve Bartman?

Then, umpire and former frog Joe West comes out from the dugout, points at Hunter Pence, gives him the boot, points at Ryan Howard, and puts him back at first. According to the rulebook, if at any point an ump feels a fan interfered with the ball, it is then ruled dead and the batter is automatically out.

Baseball, unlike football, may be the only sport that has video review and still manages to create controversy. You’re supposed to review the video IF and ONLY IF you think it was a home run. Apparently, you can’t review fan interference if the umps originally determined the ball to be a double. Charlie Manuel got ejected for arguing this.

OH MY CONTROVERSY ABOUND!! Of course, the Phillies lost this game, which was fitting. Arguing about whether reviewing the ball was correct or not seems meaningless to me. That’s like a defense attorney getting evidence thrown out in court because their defendant murdered the victim with a rent-a-car instead of his own car. If it happened, it happened. Get it right.

And nameless fan…. you got it wrong.

The boring, long, dull task of managing fantasy baseball is almost over. Theheadrush’s league was a great success this year. Adam and I are both in the playoffs (no surprise there.) In a last minute effort to scrape by with a win, I’ve dipped into the free agency pool. My team has been pretty solid all year (Konerko, Cano, Granderson, Ortiz, Francoeur) but I decided to grab a few “wildcards” to put me over the top.

The hardest stat to conquer in fantasy baseball may very well be the “Save” category. Who gets more than 2 saves a week, honestly?? Well, from August 24th-Sept 4th, my man Bobby Parnell from the Mets got 6. Nevermind that I’m risking a whole point on a guy who just got called up from the minors to perform on a dismal team with no future. I saw the numbers, I picked him up.

Then, I look through some of the hitters to see James Loney is available?? Check-mate. Loney has been a meager hitter to have all year, but in the past 14 days, .365 average, 12 runs, 12 RBIs, 3 homers. That’s all I care about. Who’s hot right now? Who can I add to my consistent line-up to give me that extra something?

You can see how well that works out for me here. It’s Tuesday, and I’m losing 2-5. Loney makes his start tonight.

Enough about baseball, though. She’s had her fill. Football is less than a week away!! That’s great and all, but really what we are saying is : FANTASY FOOTBALL IS LESS THAN A WEEK AWAY!!

We just finished the draft and I have to admit my team is utterly stacked. Bad news is, so is everyone else. We narrowed it down to an 8-man league, mostly because very few people wanted to play for money. The Lincoln Logs and Tonka trucks are down the hall, fellas. This here for the big boys.

I had the honor of first pick. Michael Vick? Yes, please. Our league sits apart from others in that it has 2 quarterbacks, so a QB was a no-brainer. Even with more traditional scoring leagues, I’m not opposed to a QB first pick. He’s going to be your bread and butter. Ain’t nobody winning a Superbowl with Rex Grossman… just saying.

The other downside to an 8-man league is I don’t know who to drop!! Just to list some of the people I drafted : Roddy White, Jeremy Maclin, Darren McFadden, Peyton Hillis, LeGarrette Blount, Darren Sproles, Tim Hightower, Mario Manningham…. I still don’t have a Defense or Kicker, lol.

Two things I will note: 1) Tim Hightower is going to have an incredible fantasy year. I’m calling it right now. Great pre-season, new team, new offense, sole responsibility. No more Arizona front-line setting him up. 2) LeGarrette Blount is on Yahoo!’s Do Not Cut list? I can’t drop Blount? How did this guy get in the ranks of Peyton Manning and Calvin Johnson after one year?

Check out the draft results and league here. I’ll have the banner and football predicts coming later this week. Get ready.


My man Adam is getting married this week. Congratulations, brother. We’re going to party it up this week to what may be the most awesome-sauced 80’s throwback event of all time.

If there’s one thing I can do, it’s the electric slide. Ladies gon’ feel me.


The Fantasy Recap : Learn From Our Mistakes

December 29, 2010 Randy Neil

After a Tuesday night debacle with the Eagles, most people’s fantasy leagues are over. The champions have been crowned, and my fantasy play off runs have come to an end. Funny enough, Adam and I both ran leagues this year, and we took first place in opposite ones. It was my first championship victory in 4 years of fantasy football. This was Adam’s 2nd year in a row in my league. What can I say? If that isn’t a staple of sports blog credibility, then I don’t know what is.

First the recap of “Carlos Ruiz los loco” in Adam’s league as I have an amazing 11-2 season :

Pretty dominating I must admit. Aaron Rodgers, Philip Rivers, Jon Kitna. Yes please.

Adam’s slow start but dominating finish down the stretch. He did the exact same thing last year. You’ll have to ask him but I think he started out 0-4 last year, and went on to win it. The man is good at adapting.

Then of course, there was the BIG BIG money championship league, where I was in the finals and couldn’t have crashed and burned more horrifically:

The guy goes out and grabs Arizona’s DEF right before the game, on a hunch? Kitna get’s sacked 4 times, throws 2 picks in the 1st ten minutes, and is pulled from the game. How the hell can you foresee Arizona’s D picking apart them that bad?? I should have known better. Here I am letting my fantasy destiny rely on a man that not only plays for one of the most despised teams in the NFL for me, but a man who also led the Detroit Lions to the worst season in NFL history. I learned my lesson.

Naturally, sitting on my bench is Dwayne Bowe who caught what I think to be 160 yrds and a TD. 28pts or so. Dexter McCluster, on the bench, 18pts. Something urged me to sit Reggie Wayne and start Bowe, but I thought “stick with the most reliable solid guys.”

Living with Adam for a year has made me know one thing : The Raiders Nation. I would never know about a guy like Nnamdi Asomugha unless Adam brought him up and mentioned how little coverage a player like that gets, because… well…. let’s face it the man get’s absolutely no recognition in the sports media. I had to Google his name just to write this. I kept saying to myself, even though a sick cornerback like this will most likely shut down Reggie Wayne, Peyton Manning is going to have to throw to somebody, and Austin Collie is out. I had Tamme and Wayne, and I started both, like a retard.

Knowshown Moreno was injured, I put him on my bench. Larod Stephen-Howlings, which if you get return yards you know about this guy, was injured, on the bench. And don’t even get me started on Chris Johnson. Damn I cursed him last week. Such an unreliable back. 58 yards? FIFTY EIGHT?? What was that 2500 yard record you were going for? Is that next year? Oh that’s right, that’s next year.

Ah fantasy football…. you are a harsh lover. Still came up 2nd in the big money league, +$100. I’ll take it. Although there was no official buy in for Adam’s league, he is getting $100 in mine, so the way I see it some sort of consolation brunch is in order. Perhaps a Denny’s grand slam.