About That Whole Vincent Jackson Thing…

August 28, 2010 Randy Neil

altAlright, so if anyone recalls I basically stated that Vincent Jackson, the Pro Bowl San Diego Chargers receiver was headed to Seattle this year.   You can see that here.  The article posted August 13th.

It is now August 28th and nothing has come of it yet.  Earlier today though, I finally managed to find something on the subject that WASN’T the Minnesota Vikings turning down Jackson’s alleged $50 million dollar contract demand.  This is turning out to be false.

What the post does say is that Vincent Jackon’s restricted free agency limits who he is allowed to talk to, and the only team that San Diego has given Jackson permission to talk to is infact the Seahawks.  You can read that post here

So we’ll see what happens.  I’ll keep ya updated.



August 26, 2010 Adam Thomas

altI wish baseball were over.  I wish it was October and the Phillies had already put me out of my misery, the Braves had already backed into the playoffs and I could stop caring about baseball. But it isn’t.  And I can’t.

The Phillies are on the verge of getting swept by the Astros.  This is terrible in and of itself, but the fact that the Braves just got steamrolled by the Rockies, and have lost 3 straight, makes it even worse.  

See, the Phillies could’ve had the lead back in the NL East.  But they didn’t.  Didn’t even seem to care that it was there for the taking.  And I’m beginning to believe that they won’t ever get it back.  Too much success turns good teams into a collection of superstar individuals. 

Werth has one foot out the door and doesn’t give a shit about the rest of the season, all because no matter how terrible he plays down the stretch (and trust me, he’s been fucking terrible) he’s going to bank eight figures from a team like the Yankees or the Red Sox. Did you see him get picked off the other night?  Last night’s home run does not extinguish the memory of that colossal fuck up. 

Halladay is a regular season ace but has never played a meaningful game and choked last night when his team tied the game, quickly putting them back down 3-2. Aces don’t do that.  

Rollins, Howard and Utley have all been invisible. Don’t even make me mention what Fransisco did last night. 

They just don’t seem like they care.  Which makes me feel like an asshole for caring so much. 

Part of me (gasp!) wants to see the Braves win the division this year, just so the Phillies will realize how much it sucks to lose and then they’ll come out all fired up next year ready to make another World Series run.

Part of me wants the Phillies to get it together and go on a tear down the stretch, pummeling opponents by 10 or more runs each night, passing the Braves and going on to the World Series.

Part of me is afraid that the run is over, that they’re too old and too content with their past accomplishments.

And of course, part of me just wants to ignore baseball for the rest of the season, get ready for some football, and not even know who makes it to the World Series. 

When the Phillies play with as little heart and as little urgency as they have been lately, it makes me wonder exactly what I am doing spending so many evenings trying to will them to victory, only to see them lose, and spend the rest of the night pissed off. 

Wake me up when the season is over, or rather, maybe I should just stay awake, because after that pitiful display I watched last night, I may have already seen the finish.


Scott Barry’s Letter to God

August 25, 2010 Adam Thomas


Dear God, It’s me Scott Barry.

Please don’t let Ryan Howard hurt me.  Please.  I’m scared God. 
Very scared. And I didn’t even do anything wrong!  Did you see him put his hands on his
hips to mock me?  Me, God.  Me.  I’m Scott Barry. 
Who is he?  Ryan
Howard?  Yeah, right.  Like people are gonna remember him in
ten years. Whereas the name Howard will be washed away by the sands of time, the name
Barry will ring out through the ages, like a beacon of white light signaling all
that is true and good in this cruel world.  Please don’t let him find me.  I know he checked his second swing, I know it.  But he mocked me, so I had to toss him
out.  The players need to know
their roles.  The fans come to see
us umpires make good calls like that, not to see oafs like Howard work a count
full with two men on in the bottom of extra innings.  That’s what fans really want to see: great calls. Not great
plays. And what can they do about it?  Baseball needs us umpires, God. 
They do. It’s not like there are technologies in place to replace
us.  It’s not like they can just
have a computer automate what’s a ball and what’s a strike, or what’s a check
swing or what’s not.  Heck, they
don’t even have computers that can tell whether a player is in the base-path or
not.  Nope, best to leave that up to us professionals.  Replay?  Who needs it?  Not when they have umpires like us, God. Umpires with egos
who will let personal agendas get in the way of making correct calls. Anyway, I
just wanted to check in and say thanks for protecting me last night.  I love you, God. 


Scott Barry


Tony Dungy, I’m So Puzzled By You

August 23, 2010 Randy Neil

altObviously in the past few weeks people have been hearing the big “controversy” of Tony Dungy and his criticism of Rex Ryan’s coaching methods.  Dungy has made it a point to call out Rex Ryan on the use of profanity in his training sessions and airing it on HBO’s “Hard Knocks” show where people are exposed to the vulgar words.  

In what he calls a ‘not personal’ attack on Rex Ryan, Dungy explains how he wouldn’t give Ryan a job based on his constant use of the ‘F’ word, repeatedly saying it’s unnecessary and that the NFL commissioner should take action against him being able to do so.  He warns how children and even some adults may be exposed to the vulgarity that is not representing the NFL well. 

I have a few different takes on this whole ordeal, but really the first thing that comes to mind is : If your so upset at Rex Ryan for coaching in a way that may represent the NFL in a bad light, shouldn’t you be upset at Roger Goodell for signing a contract with HBO to profit from something he gave the green light to? 

If anyone should be held accountable for the actions you’ve deemed to be so terrible, wouldn’t it be the NFL themselves?  They are not only promoting the ‘Hard Knocks’ television show, they are profiting from it.  Ya’ boy Roger Goodell is running the show.  You think he wasn’t aware of what would be representing the NFL when this show aired?  Is he complaining about it? 

To think that NFL players and coaches don’t use profane language is obviously foolish and naïve.  Everyone knows it, but it’s true that not everyone should be exposed to it.  What Tony Dungy is saying really isn’t all that awful.  The idea behind his self-righteous douchebag crusade really is that he doesn’t want vulgar language representing the NFL.  Ok, that’s valid.  Kinda dumb, but valid.  I don’t ever have a problem with the idea of trying to make something cleaner and more morally sound.  Dungy is just doing it in a such a stupid way, he can’t help but receive criticism. 

I don’t want to dip too much into Dungy’s personal life, but it’s obvious that his religious morals are behind a majority of his decisions.  His very public opinion on banning same-sex marriage doesn’t fair well for him, I don’t agree with it, but I do know that there are a large majority of Americans who think just like he does.  Somehow in the past few years, he’s also turned into the “go-to mentor” for almost every black athlete that’s been involved in criminal activity, most notably Michael Vick.  How’s that going for ya Dungy?  Bad?  Yea… real bad.

It’s foolish for Dungy to think that his religious morals will influence others to make major changes in their lifestyles, and it’s also foolish for him to believe that NFL training camps won’t have cursing.  With that being said, the man has also done some incredibly positive things in his life.  People often use their religious beliefs to back what would normally be very noble opinions, and thus the opinion gets lost.  He’s a positive role model.  It’s not a terrible critique of the NFL’s image, but he’s being a douche bag about it, and he’s essentially blaming the wrong people, in my opinion.

All I’m saying is, there’s often two sides to every story.  I understand the difference between the family side of the NFL, and the going to Lincoln Financial Field during a Cowboys-Eagles game side of the NFL.  You can’t ask the fans to stop cursing Tony Romo’s name in the stands, because it’s just simply not going to happen.  It’s about me exposing my child (or even myself) to the game.  I’m going to show my kid Remember the Titans, not Any Given Sunday.

They’re both very real sides of the NFL.  You can get mad that they exist, and try to prevent them from being so prevalant in the NFL, but Rex Ryan ain’t running the show Mr. Dungy.


Sunday Funday!!

August 22, 2010 Randy Neil

This is the best time to mix some potpourri into the blog.  A track from Cee-Lo’s upcoming album.  700k views in 4 days ain’t bad.



Celebrity NFL Picks

August 20, 2010 Adam Thomas


JaMarcus Russell

Yo, wuts goin? Wut it do wut it does? Is yur boy JaMarcus
Russell hear make sum NFL piks ya heard? Wut I like? Know bout it. Gotta be dem
boys da Vikings. Dem wears purple? Is what I drank. Simp as dat. Who drives
cars? Out in da wild boy. 


Cole Hamels

Heeeey guys. 
Cole Hamels here.  Lolli-pops
and gum drops.  I guess if I had to
make a pick for who’ll win the Super Bowl, it’d have to be the San Diego
Chargers. I’m from San Diego and I grew up a Chargers fan, so I’ll go with
them.  Now I know I play in
Philadelphia and should go with the Eagles, but I think Philly fans are mature
enough to respect my hometown roots and they know that I….(Interview
interrupted as a mad Philly fan runs up and kicks Hamels in the vagina. Hamels
balls up in fetal position and cries for hours.)


Abner Doubleday

Well hello there, and a good morrow to you sir. I’m Abner
Doubleday reputed father of baseball and notorious throughout our Union’s great
thirty-four states for my renowned topographical work and map-making abilities.
I choose the New England Patriots to win this year’s Super Bowl sporting contest,
if only for their wonderfully colored garments and the faultless cleft chin of
their quarterback, Tom Brady. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to get back to…(Interview
interrupted as he is bayoneted through the heart by a Confederate soldier.)