All Posts NFL

Suspending Disbelief

So…the NFL, amirite? Jeebus, what a terrible week. The whole Ray Rice fiasco now Adrian Peterson is an accused beater of children. The weird part about the Adrian Peterson story is that it prompted about a billion, “If hitting your kid with a switch is illegal, then my mom would be in prison!” har har har jokes on Twitter, which is…interesting. For one thing, everyone making that joke needs to realize, their mom is not Adrian F-ing Peterson. Peterson is chiseled, and wrecks grown men for a living, just imagine what he would do to a FOUR YEAR OLD…

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Chip Kelly Proves NFL Players are Out of Shape

Did you guys hear how well Chip Kelly’s up-tempo offense did on Monday night?  I sure did. About a zillion times. But you know what? All that it proves to me is that NFL players are out of shape. Seriously. If you can’t handle running for 5 seconds every 40 seconds, then that is a damn shame. In fact, football games only feature 11 minutes of actual action during the course of a game. If everything played out equally, that means defenses are on the field for about 5.5 minutes a game. Break it down again and individual defenses…

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Tyrann Mathieu

Turnaround the Turnaround

I am so ready for the NFL season to begin. You know why? So we can stop having insane articles like this on NFL.com: “Tyrann Mathieu proving Arizona Cardinals right with turnaround.” The only problem with this headline? Tyrann Mathieu has not played in a single NFL game. So how in the world is he ‘proving Arizona Cardinals right?’ They drafted a player with off the field issues who so far hasn’t been a headache and has looked good in pre-season games. You know who else looked good in pre-season games? The 2006 Oakland Raiders. They went 5-0 and…

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Percy Harvin

The NFL Double Standard

Can you imagine if a team like the Jets had traded a first and seventh round pick in this year’s draft and a third round pick in next year’s draft for a wide receiver, and then gave that player a 5 year contract worth 25.5 million dollars in guaranteed money AND THEN it turned out that player had to have hip surgery and was out for–possibly–the entire season? BEDLAM! But instead, we get….crickets. From CBSSports “Obviously, this is bad news for the Seahawks.” Obviously. From ESPN “The loss of Harvin is significant, but not a huge setback for a…

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Charles Woodson returns to the Raiders

Woodson returns to the Raiders: Gear up the Hate Train

Yes. Sir. Holy crap, what a great day it is to be a Raiders fan. Not only did the Raiders sign Charles Woodson on Tuesday, but it turns out that he chose the Raiders OVER the Denver Broncos, which caused the internet bloggers to collectively pee their pants. How in the world could Woodson sign with the Raiders, who everybody is pegging as the worst team in the league right now on May 22, over the almighty Denver Broncos, who everybody is already handing the Superbowl to even though–again–it’s only May 22nd? Let’s take a look at some of…

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Sadly, the NFL Draft Cannot Go on Forever…

But man oh man I wish that it could!  You know why?  Because it’s so much fun doing things like this: sitting in front of the TV, awaiting the Raiders to make their 2nd round pick, the pick comes in and it’s: Menelik Watson, OT, Florida State. And here’s my reaction: WAIT! WHO? Oh man, who! No seriously, who did we just…(goes on-line and googles Menelik Watson) THIS GUY IS AWESOME! Now, will he ever be good in the NFL? Who knows. But it my mind, he’s already the Raiders starting RT and made back to back pro-bowls. Also,…

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TheHeadrush Mock Draft (or at least the first 5 picks)!

Today is the big day. Arguably my favorite ‘sporting’ day of the year. I absolutely love the NFL draft and have been obsessed with it since January. You know why? Cause the team I root for (the Raiders) is terrible, and these are the 3 days of the year when I am filled with hope (well, I guess I am filled with hope on opening day too, but then that hope gets crushed). Anyway, I am only going to try and guess the top 5 picks here, and since I expect there to be a gazillion trades on Thursday,…

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